“Why
Indonesia?” is the first question that most people ask when I tell them that I
have accepted a position as an English Teacher in Jakarta.
“Why
not?” is really the only answer I have prepared.
Why
Indonesia? Because I can’t take one more
day sitting at a dull desk answering dull calls and watching the clock. Why Indonesia? Because I need to teach; I need to stand in
front of a group of students and impart my knowledge. I need to watch them grow and learn.
Why
Indonesia? Because I return home every
night and close my door and retreat to my apartment, where I never admire the
outside world or see the beauty in the Earth.
I know
that there a million answers to the question, “Why Indonesia?” just as there
are a million answers to the question, “Why not?” I guess what it boils down to is the fact
that I am 33, single, and have nothing holding me here. If I don’t go now, I never will. My brother’s response was, “See you in a
month,” and while that stung a little, I realized the toll that my moves have
put on my family. If there is a valid, “Why
not?” this is it.
I hate
having to explain to Aunt Joann that I will be leaving again. I hate knowing that my best friend will be
literally halfway across the world. I
hate that my brother will worry about me (even though he would probably deny
that). I hate that I could be wrong and
I hate that I may want to come back right away.
I know all these things. But I
also remember John telling me that I needed to keep trying until I got it
right. That’s what I’m doing.
So,
when you ask, “Why Indonesia?” and all I do is give you a blank stare, this is
why. I can’t quite put my answer into
words. I only know that it is where I
need to be right now.
